Friday, 16 July, 2010

Life, Monkey Business & everything in between.


Blue lights in my face, warm guitar strings ringing in my ears, thumping beats of the drums and the boong of the bass, a sea of people swinging to the fusion, when suddenly I hear a distinct sound, sound Ive heard before, that am familiar with, and am saying to myself, where !? in freaking hell is this techno crap disturbing my metal melody, and its getting louder, rays of blue light soon turn white, the guitars soon go mute, and the freaking techno sound is the loudest thing I can hear now, Bloody hell, Good freaking Morning Nik ! I crawl to the other side of my bed, shut the freaking alarm on my cell phone.

Realize the damn thing has gone off since the last half n hour, which means I am so damn late today baby ! I spring up, start multi tasking, err you don't wanna know how and what, so lets skip this one :P

So am late as usual, but lets just say am on time :D, rushing through the beautiful morning crowd of Tokyo, yeah am not kidding, if there is one thing that is strong enough (stronger than my morning espresso) to wake me up, it's the Tokyo beauties, nothing like seeing a sea of beautiful all decked up women early in the morning, yeah I hear you say, "Damn !!! Good Morning !" .

So any ways (yeah yeah, stop envying me you guys) I get into office elevator, 13th floor
- Ju-san Kai (yeah I wanna tell you am learning Japanese, and I like showing off on that :P ) is where I sit.

I Get my blazer off and rest it, sharp 9:10 Am my butt hits the chair, open my mails, and I see a reminder, 9:00 AM meeting 10 minutes over due..... trouble, see my Manager in the meeting invites, now its a night mare.

Without wasting a second, I get my tired butt up, (and i hear it say "but we just started resting !") and head to the 6th Floor.

Rush to find the room 6A, now I really wanna describe this feeling well, how many of us have been to meetings so late... ? errr ok... yeah...yeah... mine's too bad, but am sure a few at least, It's like attempting to burst your first ever big sound fire cracker, should I or should I not is the question, but you know you have to (sheer peer pressure those days ), so you stay as far, but just close enough by stretching yourself to touch & light the wick... that's how I would describe me opening the meeting room door.

"Creeek inkyooooo burrr", that's what the door shouted out in its so far uninterpreted language, the damn door just had to alarm all in the room, as if screaming out to all, hey everybody ! look ! here comes Mr Perfect timing ! bwahahahahaha....

All eyes flash high lights on me, one time when you really want to believe you are the star of the show, but then your dawned by realization, that its for all the wrong reasons !

My manager is all smiles, rather a big Wide Grin, as if to say "you are so screwed now !". I sit next to him he shares this huge A3 Sheet with font size ... 8, errr wait, 7 mmm no I guess it was 6. Cause i can read 7 with ease, and this was way to blurry for me, half of it had Kata kana & Kanji.

Trust me the sheet had some sorta big table drawn on it with n cloumns and n rows, but as stupid as it may sound it looked like some one had made a big chess board with all the coloring gone wrong, yeah ... thats what it looked like to me.

This was a big meeting, and had big people on it, talk about a first impression, I kept my face down as much as possible, so that i don't show my self too much (i felt like the Ostrich who digs his face in conveniently to think no one can see him !) .

What happens next ? even better, they are all talking Finance big talk, am a small guy, know my technology well, and am now struggling but slowly learning the business, cause after all, it's what matters. So here am listening to random words like "realized P & L", "unrealized P & L", positions, greeks, delta's, as much as I knew all about this now, a few months back this is how I was interpreting all these words I just mentioned.

Realized p & L - I definitely have to realize my ultimate goal in life.
Unrealized p & L - I m yet to realize what am I doing here.
Positions - Am definitely in no position to understand financial mumbo jumbo.
Greeks - I love Greek mythology and Greek chicks ! :D
deltas - this is the squad I pick up before playing my favorite warfare game on Xbox :P

Now as guilty as I am about understanding every damn thing that is being said around me, I start to really get frustrated, some what like a monkey who doesn't get attention. I start scratching my head, hold my face between my hands, rest my head on one fist, all typical Monkey positions.

One new guy on the Team asks my business counterpart, do we post realized p & L to the ledger from the front office ? or do we post both realized and un realized, Mr Fox as I'd like to describe him replies with a cool attitude, we always report the realized p & l from the Ledger, which was not the exact answer which our new friend was looking for, but took it and sat down, because of the sheer attitude with which the answer was delivered to him ("what ! ? you don't even know this !?!, what the hell are you doing here, who hired you ?").

Soon before the meeting ended and the work for me started, the chair person of the meeting said about a system called "Rex" looking into the chess board, errr I mean the sheet, and me and Mr Fox start looking into the sheet, searching for the word "Rex", everyone else seems to have found it and reading very carefully, Mr Fox whispers in to my ears, "are you able to find it ?" I said, errrm, am still looking (with a please don't kill me for this look on my face), to my surprise he too hasn't, so we mutually decide to stop the rambling chair person to ask, "Could you help us with the details on Rex on this sheet ?"

And the chair person says "oh am so sorry, I have a different version with me, that wont be on the handouts Ive given". "Whoaaaa, OMFG ! bwahahahahaha" is what i was doing in my head, trying real hard not to let my laugh out, Mr Fox cracks a humorous one saying, "And I thought only the T-REX was extinct". That gave me a chance to laugh out hard !!! I guess every one else was just either sleeping or being a monkey following another one :)

So you see now, the point is, you me are just monkeys in this mud pile the world calls business, what was turning out to be a night mare, made me realize, every one else is just as bad or good as you are, but they all chose to be monkeys following another one, but I chose not to ;)

So I ended my day listening to the song by The FooFighters - "Don't wanna be your Monkey Wrench !" Are you ?













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